FFFFFFFFFFFFFF   FFFFor your convenience a list of what is punk rock and what is not.

                       by Jello Somalia
                              of
                  The Estranged Youth Society



What IS punk:


1.  Waking up in the morning and not knowing where you are.

2.  Paying your bill at Denny's off of someone else's tip.

3.  Forgetting your parent's name.

4.  Reviewing records you only heard part of from someone's car stereo as      
    they drove by.

5.  Not leaving your room for 24 hours or more.

6.  Getting kicked out of church.

7.  Getting kicked out of a homeless shelter.

8.  Writing a book report on MaximumRockNRoll for school.

9.  Getting wasted off of houshold cleaners.

10.  Paying your rent by shoplifting.

11.  Wearing decapitated Barbie Dolls around your neck.

12.  Decapitating Barbie Dolls at school and getting sent to the school    
     psychologist to get out of class.

13.  Living in someone's basement without them knowing.

14.  Hitchiking to work.

15.  Shocking yourself on an electric fence for fun.


16. Sleeping in a dumpster.

17.  Falling asleep in the back of a police car after being arrested.

Gee, that's about all I can think for that part of the list, too bad. Now a list of
things to help you figure out if you're NOT punk rock:



1.  Passing high school.

2.  Getting tucked in at night.

3.  Considering yourself too mature to watch Mr. Rogers just to make fun of   
    him with all your friends.

4.  Actually NOT ditching school on Career Day.

5.  Knowing who won the Super Bowl.

6.  Wanting to be a policeman when you grow up.

7.  Telling your parents you love them.

8.  Having your parents be proud of you.

9.  Showing respect for your PE coach.


Well, hope this list helps in everyone's eternal quest to become more punk
rock. Later, and join the Estranged Youth Society (chances are, you can reach
me or other EYS members wherever you got this from).

                         JELLO SOMALIA