An Encounter with Absolute Love                         TANQUEST.TAN
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       From the book Tantric Quest by Daniel Odier
       Devi seized my hand and, with lightening speed, flattened it against 
       the coals. I let out a cry and instantly withdrew it. There wasn't a
       single mark on it or any sensation of burning. The coals, 
       nevertheless, had been crushed under my palm. Devi looked at me with 
       a sort of serene and mysterious half-smile that gave her face a full, 
       radiant expression. "Now you have touched the tattva of fire." 

       I remained silent, looking at my hand as if I expected to see 
       blisters appear. Small stones landed in the pot. 
       I drank some tea, then thought about this feeling of holding back, 
       of resistance, that I had had during meditation. I spoke
       to her about it. "Our strongest resistance is the resistance to ecstasy
       because we sense that to succumb to it we must abandon all certainty,
       abandon what we have put so many years into constructing. We must
       abandon our philosophy of life. Our beliefs, our ideas, even the
       concept of the void, even the concept of the absolute or of Shiva stand
       in the way of ecstasy. It is relatively easy to abandon fashionable
       ideas. It is much more difficult to give up philosophical and religious
       concepts. One proudly proclaims oneself an atheist, believer, Buddhist,
       Christian, Muslim, Hindu, tantrika. The divine can't be grasped in this
       manner. What's the difference between an atheist and a believer'
       Nothing. They are two sides of the same coin. It isn't a matter of
       believing or not believing. It's a matter of communicating with the
       nature of one's mind. It's like diving into a lake. Too often, we want
       to lose ourselves conceptually in the teachings as they unfold to us,
       and without realizing it we build a coat of armor against the divine.
       The most subtle teachings must be abandoned along the way. The
       tantrika's courage is in letting go of teachings once they've been
       absorbed. Even the Tantras aren't worth any more than a skin abandoned
       on the stones by a molting snake. When one is constantly changing,
       there comes a day when the consciousness rests on nothing. Then
       awakening occurs. Only total abandonment of the mental can open us to
       the divine." 

       "Is awakening subject to transformation?"
       "All nature is subject to transformation. An awakening that isn't in
       accord with the deep nature of things gradually becomes diluted. One
       morning, you open your eyes but you're no longer awake." "A Ch'an
       master speaks of the slow polishing of the awakening." "That's it. It's
       not enough to find a raw nugget. It's necessary to let life run over it
       until the gold dazzles the entire universe." Devi ate slowly. Each of
       her movements was in harmony; each mouthful seemed to bring her
       profound joy. This way of absorbing herself in things extended to her
       every activity. I had the impression that nothing was done
       mechanically. With her, everything was an occasion for communicating
       deeply, for remaining always anchored in reality. Thus, everything she
       did became a teaching for me. Through my association with her, I
       noticed those "holes" that punctuate our daily lives when we completely
       lose consciousness of the moment and of the divine harmony as well. It
       worked like real magic in Devi's least gesture, action, expression. It
       was as if the flow of time suddenly found itself slowed down by a dance
       partner from reality. Devi took up where she'd left off in her
       teaching. "The so-called subtle tattvas are, smell, taste, form, touch,
       sound. "The first is the heart of th <Next comes the tattva of taste.
       Take a bit of oatmeal. Savor it. Penetrate to the heart of taste. Taste
       the reality of this heart, which contains all the tastes of the earth.
       That's what must be penetrated. It's in this sense that the Tantras say
       one attains 'the unique savor.' >The tattva of form, the heart of form,
       is found in the formless, which is the matrix of all the forms in the
       world. Like the oat flakes, which have lost their own form in the
       cooking, know the heart of form by following this dissolution, which
       takes place throughout the universe. <You can gain access to the tattva
       of touch by touching my hand. What do you feel?> <Your skin, your
       flesh, your bone . . .> <You feel the heart of touch. Your skin and
       mine brush against each other. It is as if all your skin has touched
       mine. A shiver runs through your whole body, and you enter into the
       heart of touch. Through me, the universe slips under your hand. Is it
       possible for two skins to touch each other completely? For each
       millimeter of your skin to touch each millimeter of mine?> <It's
       impossible.> <Then what is love?> I remained silent, without response,
       and profoundly moved. <Is it possible for each millimeter of your
       consciousness to touch each millimeter of the divine?> <Yes . . > <Do
       you hear me?> <Yes.> <Then it is the tattva of the heart of speech. To
       cross through it, you listen to the entire universe. It's in this sense
       that all that's heard in the universe is the mantra, AUM. All mantras
       are contained in the mantra AUM. Close your eyes. Listen to the
       mantra.... Only when you've heard it without a pause for three days and
       three nights will you be able to say it. To chant a mantra before
       having heard it is to arrive at death before being born.
       > From the book: Tantric Quest