ChRySTAL VISIONS thru the ASTRAL MIRROR copyright 1984 by Boleskine House,inc. West Danby, NY INTRODUCTION Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law. The response to Frater PVN's first volume of Astral & Dream Workings has been overwhelming. Many people have written to tell is how much they enjoy PVN's `un-polished' diary entries compared to the grave formality & `seriousness' which characterizes so many of the standard texts on Sex Magick & Alchemy. Many of you have asked for more volumes from PVN's on-going Magickal Record. We have convinced PVN to interupt work on latest project to edit the series of diaries which you are now holding. It is with great pleasure that we are able to bring you Volume II of his Diaries so much sooner than expected. The `disclaimers' regarding literal use of PVN's material which appeared in Volume I also hold true for this volume. The Astral Plane is very personal. Each aspirant is counciled to make h-is/er own contacts on the inner & develop a personalized system of magick before undertaking to duplicate or expand on the experiments of other magickians. The material in this booklet should be thought of as `suggestive' & as an `indication' of what may be accomplished by anyone who has the inspiration & fortitude to locate his/her own inner gateways & explore those regions which remain elusively `outside' the realms delineated in standard texts. It is to these intrepid explorers of internal realities that this present volume is dedicated. Frater PVN is none other than Frater PVN who is the author of many essays on Sexual Alchemy and Thelemic Politics. We have encouraged PVN to supplement his dream & astral material with outlines & fragmentary essays (also from his daily magickal record) to give readers an inkling of where he gets his inspiration, & how he begins to work his ideas into viable essays. We have always found that creativity in its `raw' state is often exciting to behold, especially when all the `loose ends' are left dangling, `as an excercise for the student'. Some readers have asked us to reccommend texts or guidebooks to help them learn to work with dreams via crystals. After doing a bit of research on our own, & consulting with PVN, we have come to the conclussion that alchemical techniques which can only be `hinted-at' in books, must be `learned' by each seeker on an individual basis -- thru internal hermetic exploration, &/or thru working in conjunction with others who already practice astral projection, sex magick, and crystal shamanism. After much careful consideration, PVN feels that he has now reached that stage of development where it is now his Will to pass-on advise, guidance, & initiation to self-motivated seekers -- utilizing techniques which he has found efficacious in his own work. For now, he can offer counciling via crystal skrying, Tarot readings, etc. Those with more advanced &/or personal needs will be able to work with PVN to design special programs. At present, much is still in the planning stages. If you would like more information, contact PVN at Mumbo Jumbo Kathedral bbs. Love is the law, love under will. Yrs.for the Great Work, Bill Siebert (for Boleskine House) * * * Fragment from 15 Dec.`82 During dreams last night I did manage some Atlantean work. This universe seems to have a propensity towards being a closed circle with endless repititions unless one excercises free will in order to break the cycle of inevitability. The fall of Atlantis is in our collective past, yet it is also in our future unless we do something to avoid it. For all intents & purposes, this point in time is Atlantis. We are faced with both nuclear destruction & invasion from outer space (the invaders are being invoked by the fearful who want `our star brothers' to come & put an end to the threat of nuclear destruction). We could simply play-out one of the various destruction scenarios, or we could break out of the cycle altogether through the use of collective individual responsibility. Atlantis & crystals are almost synonomous terms. Therein lies a key. Now I must locate the appropriate lock. Using free association, I link together the crystal shamans (Oh Shinnah, myself, Rudy, etc.), the Space program (Carl Sagan, Tim Leary), the OTO (both individual Branches & united Above the Abyss), and computers. Crystals underlying the whole. The Atlantean crystal has been fragmented (so I am told) by the previous destructive end of the cycle. We all have a piece of it (probably within out trans-temporal esoteric nervous system). We need to give up exclusive rights to our individual pieces in order that we all may gain unrestricted access to the whole. Space travel to remove some of the eggs from our very fragile basket. Sex magick for personal development & an end to jealous ridiculousness & territorial stupidity. * * * [here begins excerpts from Diary entry for Wednesday, 29 December, 1982 e.v.] I have just completed a two-day mini-working which I shall call the chocolate cremecheese pie Working. Rich foods at bedtime plunge my blood sugar down to a level where I am able to access information with little or no dream overlays to hinder the information flow. During neither night did I manage to reach the state of pure information transfer, but the dreams were quite interesting, al- though quite fragmented. Night one gave me partial rememberance of a (series?) of vacations which I do not think belong to this life (at least not yet). I went to Boston & spent much time at the beaches on the ocean. While at the sea, I relaxed & was able to release the sorrows within me. I understood my purpose & my role in the formulation of the future. Other Shadow Knights were on the beach also. The whole resort was a kind of rest area for those whose main work is accomplished in their dreams. I tried to remember as much as possible, but the memories are only vague shadows. Binah brings rememberance, but my waking life is not able to comprehend such rememberances yet. All I have is a vague nostalgia for a vacation I do not remember having taken. On the second night I was more able to extract concrete information from the dreams & bring the information back to my waking consciousness. I was in a region of astral New York City which I did not recognize. It was a high class neighborhood with many opulant food carts along a sidewalk in front of movie theaters. The theaters were walled shut, but I knew I could enter them through the cracks in the mortar. I selected a movie about zombies, and oozed into the theater. In the movie house, I met a doctor who had spent years investigating death & immortality by sleeping in graveyards within a sensory deprivation tank. His findings were of no suprize to me, even though I have never done such research personally. There are aspects of bodily function which need the symbiotic realtionship of a fully conscious `soul', but there are also certain bodily functions (certain aspects of healing & regeneration) which require that the `soul' leave the body so the `lower' functions of the body can regenerate without interferance. During disease & old age, the soul must leave the body, or the body will weaken & die. Most people in our society do not know how to cope with such experiences & some lose their way while out of body. This is one of the myriad origins of the comatose state. The doctor told me that most people believe that death-mimicing coma is a nightmare of the past (when medical science was unable to detect faint heartbeat, respiration, etc.), but he assured me that it is every bit as common today as it was two centuries ago. Now, however, the doctors have been able to mask the symptoms through prompt embalming to kill the body so the soul cannot return to embarrass them. With proper medical supervision during coma (refrigeration, blood pumps to keep the brain nourished, etc.) there is no reason why a body cannot heal itself of any disease while the soul goes off on a long astral trip (several years would not be extra- ordinary). But most people are not that attached to their bodies. When the body is very ill, the soul simply leaves on a journey to find a new body in its formative stages. The ensuing nine months of sensory deprivation, coupled with the trauma of birth & the total un-coord- ination of the new body causes severe mental imbalance & total amnesia. But such problems are by no means mandatory. With the proper training, a soul should be able to `commute' between the old sick body & the new fetal body during the crucial nine months. If the soul is actually out of body at the moment of birth, but close enough to observe/participate in the birth, it should be possible to retain complete awareness & full memory. Whether this is desireable is yet another question. Also some vague memories of entering an underground parking garage with a demon's maw as an entrance. The ramp spiraled down (deosil) with a shaft of light, flame, & smoke as the central core of the helix. I extended my leather wings & rode the air currents down into the pit at the center of the earth. I think this is where the Boston/Binah vacation memories began the first night, but it is difficult to assess clearly. Time for bed. I will write more when my energy level is higher. I will work more with my father tonight. If he needs a new home for his soul, perhaps I can in someway ease the transition. [note: PVN's father was sick at the time of this working and was beginning his transition out of this life. PVN has never been emotionally close to his father, but he is very much aware of the presence of his father within his own nervous system.] * * * [here begins excerpt from diary entry dated Thursday, 30 December, 1982 e.v.] More strange/wonderful/bizzarre dreams last night {without the use of chocolate cremecheese pie or other entheogens}. The dream is fragmented, but seemingly connected in a way which still escapes me. I have pieces of a holographic image, but not enough fragments to give the image very clear resolution. I am fairly certain that as I tell my tale, I will begin to perceive more fragments & be able to sort things out as I type. I entered the parking garage with the demon's maw entrance which I remembered from the Boston/Binah dream. The central column of the helical ramp was medly of forces involved in an on-going dance which transcended both time & space. From below, fire & smoke pushed upwards, while from above, clear light & gentle breezes pushed downwards. Eddy currents & counterflows were the rule rather than the exception. I spread my leather wings & became a flying lizard with ape-like features. I coasted upon the wind as I spiraled downward. The parking ramp became a series of grottos & tunnels whose entrances were aranged in a spiral about the central shaft of light fire wind & smoke. At each tunnel entrance there was one or more beings. Some were human, but most were not. Some of these beings would occassionaly jump out into the central column & sprout wings such as my own. As they flew/glided in the wind & smoke, they would all gradually transform themselves into a being such as myself -- a mamalian lizard with large leather wings attached to the shoulder blades, powerful clawed forearms with opposing thumbs, large kangaroo-like tail, rather feral head, but with no visible hair. Most (like myself) were exadurated androgynes with swollen breasts oozing milk from large hard nipples complimented with stout purple veined cocks perpetually on the verge of orgasmic explosion. Below pendulous testicles lurked a cavernous vagina, which dripped sweet smelling juices into the air, bathing the whole central column in a fog of holy dew. I observed my fellows with only mild curiosity, fixing most of my attention upon the caves & tunnels. Occassionaly one of my fellows would land at the lip of a cave & I would see him/her transform into a being which looked much like one of the beings already upon the ledge. As I flew/coasted along, I felt drawn to one particular cave. It looked `interesting' in a way which I cannot begin to explain. I circled it a bit & then landed. A human came from the mouth of the cave & greeted me with great formality. I instinctively returned the greeting & was transformed into a teenage girl. Memories a bit hazey at this point. I remember walking through endless miles of caverns, guided by an old man dressed as a monk, with flowing white hair & a beard. He held a sphere (about the size of a tangerine) which gave off blue light which had a slight reddish tinge to it. The light was quite pure, but it was not sufficiently bright to allow me to see clearly. We did not go in a straight path, for we needed to pick up various items which had been stashed within the cavern system over the aeons. By the time we finally emerged on the surface, I had my arms full of various pieces of armor, weapons, scrolls, and impliments which had no meaning for me. My guide remained totally silent & carried naught but the blue sphere. When we reached the surface, my guide motioned me to leave the cave & join the group of people in a valley below us. He stayed within the cave & I did not see him again. Somehow I found myself amongst a group of people watching the sky. I had no memories of the earlier portion of my dream or of any other lives. Most of the people around me seemed to be peasants of some kind. All were dressed in colorful clothing as if going to a festival. Technology was in evidence, but not prominant. A light bi-plane circled overhead. Suddenly a large dragon flew over the ridge of hills & began pursuing the biplane. I unsheathed my lance & threw it up in the air (like a spear). The lance zoomed upwards for several hundred meters, but my timing was off. It struck the tail of the biplane rather than the dragon. The lance fell back to earth & I went off to locate the lance so that I could do battle with the dragon. I was dressed in light alloy armor & I was somehow amused/confused that I was a girl. Somehow I knew that I had once been other than a girl, but I couldn't trace the memory very clearly. The dragon had landed in one of the towers of the University & I followed it without my lance. I took one of the short axes from one of the decorative suits of armor in the hallway, by breaking the shaft of the weapon to free it from the restraining bolt. I charged into the room which had sheltered the dragon. The dragon had transformed itself into a huge eyeball with tentacles. As I slashed at the eye I sang: Hail unto thee who art Ra in thy falling, Even unto thee who art Ra in thy destruction; Vengence is mine for the maidens whom thou has slain, Death to the all-seeing eye of the God! As I sang the song, something in me was vaugely uncomfortable with the content. I somehow felt I was reciting a parody of something else, but I could not place the context or the memory. I was suddenly oversome with a very powerful urge to engage in sex. This bewildered me somewhat (I think I was virginal). I was very distrustful of the peasant men I saw as I felt they were not very gentle or caring about the feelings of a warrior lass such as me. I bathed the ichor of the Eye of Ra from off my body in a secluded pool & wandered naked up to an old oak grove frequented by druids & faeries. I located a band of gentle druids who initated me into the magicks of sex & learned from them how to ride the winds of eternity. They warned me never to ride the winds near the dark caves, or the spirits of the darkness would steal my soul forever. I did not mock their warnings, lest I offend them, but I could not heed the warnings either. I loved to play amidst the windy caves near the top of the old dark mountains where no other souls dared venture. The more I played in these winds, the more I began to remember of other lives beyond this peaceful valley. If the truth be known, I was very bored when I was not astral tripping after sexual union. One day I finally screwed up my courage enough to fly my astral self directly into the darkest & most forboding of the caves. As I flew, I left my memories in various caches along within the tunnel as a trail to aid my return. But as I traveled I found other memories, left there by another (perhaps even myself!) & I hungrily devoured them as I flew. By the time I reached the column of fire, wind, air, and light, I had all but forgotten my life amidst the peasants & druids of the quiet valley. But I knew a little about the many tunnels which branched outward from this spiral helix & of the central core of duality. I lept off the edge of the path into the void of flame & smoke as I shed the last remnants of my soul-stuff. My demon body quickly formed around my central void & I became (once again) one of those androgenous monsters who fly & glide between the fabrics of reality. Somehow I made it back to the tunnel entrance where I entered the maze. I shed my androgenous mammalian-lizard body & reformed myself into my `usual' astral form. I left via the maw of the parking ramp & found myself in astral New York, near my astral temple in the red light district. I went to my temple & committed the memories of this dream to my dream crystal, to be stored there until my physical self was ready & willing to commit this vision to paper. [end of dream] Very bizzarre! When I began this diary entry I had nothing more than vauge fragments about flying in the parking garage, being some sort of a dragon slaying female, & the battle with the giant eyeball. Somehow I am developing a set of skills which allows me to `record' my dreams far more lucidly than I can consciously remember. * * * [Here begins excerpt from entry for 19 January, 1983 e.v.] The last two nights I have had a series of (seemingly) inter- connected dreams which I feel belong to the Boston Dream cycle. It is not easy to explain exactly what I mean by the Boston dream cycle, but I shall do my best to clarify. Those dreams which I remember as being powerful, initiatory, or memorable are (for the most part) not isolated dreams, but part of a larger group or family of dreams. For the sake of categorization, I have broken the overall set of `magickal' dreams into subsets, even though I fully realize that they are all part of the same major set. Thus I have my `Lovecraftian' dreams, my `Pyramids in the Abyss' Dreams, my `Druidic grove' dreams, my `University Beyond the Abyss' dreams, my `Astral New York City' dreams, etc., etc., which all seem to over-lap or impinge on one another sooner or later. I have never really spent much time in Boston, so I really don't understand why I can name this dream cycle with such certainty. It is reminiscent of the great city which houses my University, just on the Kether side of the Abyss. It is a large city, but with a friendly feel to it (much like Ithaca), with lots going on in the way of Arts, Science, tourism, etc. I usually go to this city as an invited guest, or as a tourist at a nice hotel. I am always welcome & I always have a good time. The sea is always in the background, but I rarely go to the beach. Of the dream from night before last, there is not much to say. I was staying with Paul & Liz (but Liz was very different from her usual self. It was a weeked party at a secluded house. In some ways it reminds me of the place in which they held their wedding reception, but much more massive. I met a woman there who really knocked me off my feet. Not many details, but very strong nostalgic feelings, as though I were remembering a sweet memory from a youth I never had (at least not yet in this lifetime anyway). Last night was more substantial. In some ways it felt like I was back in the same dream, but on an entirely different level. I was at the magickal convention which I dreamed of the night before my letter from Miracle. I was speaking with an old Sufi woman about Anne & the proccess of creating one's own soul. She spoke in words, while I spaced out & went into a trance in which I saw the proccess on a molecular level, devoid of most of the maya/ego/self-centeredness which makes the process so difficult for those who are unable to remember the theoretical mechanics behind the individual problem. The old woman stopped talking & I returned to an awareness of my surroundings. She smiled & reminded me that one could not know one's office -- indeed, could not have an office! -- until the proccess of creating a center had been undertaken & had been successful insofar as was possible before entering service to the race. It was then & only then that one would be able to see the various offices as enticements rather than simply as burdensome chores. She then named several of the Offices which she saw me as capable of fulfilling. Some of them I could not hear clearly. She smiled when I looked puzzled & nodded her head at me & said that I would learn when the time was ripe. She then took a small box (about 1.56" on a side) from beneath her robe & handed it to me. She bid me to open it & accept the bauble which it contained. I opened the box & was immediately suckedinto the black maestrom of force from the void within the box. During ther next phase of the dream, I had no reccollection of the previous portion of the dream, or of any reality beyond the one in which I found myself. I was some sort of quasi-human spirit guide to an old black priest. When the man was about to die, I gave him a shiimering black & silver chasuble in which he was to sing his own Requium Mass. This was (of course) against the rules. I was placed in a state of suspended animation until the end of the world. When I awoke, everyone who had ever lived was being revived at once. All were getting into groups behind their individaul patron saints -- all the English behind Saint George, all the Irish behind Saint Patrick, all the hookers behind Saint Floradora, etc., etc. Somehow I managed to stray away from those who had not yet formed a group in order to watch the parade. When nobody was looking, I ducked- out completely. I went `behind' the scenes via a tunnel used by electricians & janitors. I stealthfully peered down a grate within the dark tunnel & spied on some aliens who were in some sort of a control room. One of them saw me & pushed up & over the grate & attempted to paralyse me with the stingers on its tentacles. I opened a small box which I had always carried {the box given to me by the old Sufi woamn in the previous dream sequence} & a brilliant white light blinded & confused the alien while I made my escape. Further along down the tunnel I was met by three guards (humans, with ray guns) & they attempted to take me prisoner. After a skirmish in which I temporarily stunned two of them, I left the tunnel & made an attempt to escape from this reality altogether. I began to remember that I did not belong here, but was only here to observe & to learn, rather than become caught-up in local politics. I changed myself into a rocket ship & took off. I then created a simulacrum of myself to act as a decoy, should they manage to trace me. They did manage to find me. All of a sudden, there were two aliens on the bridge with my decoy. They wore the outward form of humans, but there was definitely something `snakey' and unsavory about them. They seemed fooled by the simulacrum. Since my true being was the rocket ship itself, I was around the aliens while they `questioned' my decoy (whom they believed to be me). I did not understand the politics of this reality very well at all. Seems there was some advanced races which were `staging' an end of the world for a primitive human race & the advanced didn't want me messing things up. They started to search the flight control computer for information after my simularcrum disolved during a rather intense set of ques- tioning which caused it remember that it did not really exist. At first they could not get the box open, but when they did, they regretted it immediatly. The cabin of the spacecraft was filled with brilliant white light. I was drawn to the light, so I folded myself into the box & took the box with me. As I was the plane which contained the two aliens, they were forced through the vortex with me. I was back with the old Sufi woman, only she was now young & very sexually provacative. I held the small box on my palm & was in the proccess of extracting a very massive ring, encrusted with jewels from the box. The ring itself was composed of two Ureas serpents, intertwined & holding a round disk in their mouths. The disk was enammeled metal, depicting the Necronomicon sigil. Locked to the rim of the disk was a spider-web like wheel whose spokes held precious stones which cast colored shadows upon the face of the disk. The wheel could be aligned in many ways in relationship to the enamaled disk beneath. As I rotated the wheel, the whole ring seemed to transmute into an entirely different design. The original design was not lost, but somehow `covered-up' as though a hologram of another ring had been projected over the design of the first ring. In one orientation, the ring looked very much like a signet ring bearing the seal of the OTO; in another it looked like one of the emblems of the Shadow Knights; in yet another it bore the Papal insignia. As I spun the dial I recognized dozens of insignia and failed to recognize hundreds. I asked the young Sufi woman if the ring actually carried the authority of any of the organizations which it could seemingly mimic. She looked at me with a crafty glimmer in her eyes as she told me that all true initaiates would be able to see my ring was but a counterfeit iff the real ring of Power for that particular organization were manifest & in the hands of the rightful ruler of that sect, but that if the rightful ruler were not in a position of power or if the Ring of Power was not then manifest on the outer, then none could be certain that my claims to office were invalid. I became more puzzled than ever & the Sufi just laughed at me. I asked what was the purpose of a magic ring which did not represent real power. She told me that the power was very real, but was diffused so that it could be used to focus the empowerment of whomever wore the ring for whatever purpose was neccessary. With the aid of this ring, anyone could manifest any valid magickal current for as long as was neccessary to reify the true contacts with the Fountainhead of the Current, but the ring could never be mis-used by those who did not comprehend that the leadership of a Magickal Order was an office appointed by the gods & not a bauble to be passed-on to a favorite nephew or son. As I continued to play with the ring, I recognized the facial expressions of the two serpents whose inter-twined bodies formed the band of the ring. They were the two aliens who had tracked me down in the alternate reality of the previous dream sequence. As I played with the ring, I noticed that the serpent beings were still alive & that through their motions, the ring was fully adjustable to fit any sized finger -- in fact it expanded from a circle so tiny it could hold-tight to a human hair to a circle well over three inches in diameter (3.141593" is a better approximation). I held the ring up so the Sufi could see the huge maximum diameter of the ring. She smiled & said that since I had discovered the trick of expanding the ring, she would show me how to potentize the ring for any/all magickal Currents. She slipped the ring over my cock & balls, tweaked it tight, and led me from the main convention room into a temple or shrine. The room was dimly lit by the light of alcohol braziers perched upon the heads of two huge stone Cobras. Between the Cobras was a Roman style couch with lion claw feet holding crystal spheres covered in blue satin with gold trim. She led me to the couch, laid me down & mounted upon me. The bezel of the ring pressed into her clittoris as she drew me inside of her. The twin serpents seemed to bend over the couch as I passed into the neither-neither state -- the flames from atop their heads illuminating the dome of polished anthracite which formed the ceiling of the room. As the Sufi danced & gyrated upon the shaft of my penis, I could feel the wheel of precious stones moving with relation to the enameled disk. As different aspects came into cojunction & were annionted with the elixirs of the priestess, an electric tingle passed through me from the base of my anal chakra to the crown of my head. The two stone serpents were now entwined over the couch (their two heads being merged into one) & the flames at their head lept upward each time the elctric jolt reached my crown chakra. At each flash of the serpent flame, I saw images projected into the curved balck mirror above me. The images were superimposed one over the other so fast that I could neither seperate them into coherant vignettes, nor serialize them into a linear story. When both of our bodies were covered with sweet smelling sweat, hounds came out from the inter-dimensional angles at the corners of the room & began to lick the sweat from our bodies as we continued the opus. Tentacles came from the mirror & consummed the dogs as we both came to a mutual orgasm which caused the whole universe to project from the spinning cock ring up through my spine & out into the mirror & then then collapse back into me via the open crown chakra. As the images surged through me back down into the ring, I became lost within my own nervous system. My external senses of awareness closed down completely & I fell into the ring along with the images. I awoke. I was fully clothed. I was standing with an old Sufi woman on a dirty street in New York City talking with her about the changing role of the priesthood in this AEon. She smiled at me and handed me a small box. I had a very strong sense of Deja-vu as I began to lift the lid, but could not quite pin the feeling down. The box contained an invisible ring which seemed to change and shift as I moved it. It was too big to fit my finger. The old woman laughed at me and said that I would grow to fit the ring when I was ready to undertake its responsibilities. She passed her hands over my eyes & I remembered the whole of this dream as I have recorded it. When she removed her hands, I was alone, hanging in a void, playing with my two crystals -- the dark & the clear. * * *